He said they have to “get off their X,” otherwise they are in greater danger the longer they wait and hide. This Navy Seal was referring to the necessity of moving to safety in a combat zone. Obviously, the situation a Navy Seal might be in is often life-threatening and requires heroic acts of bravery.
But the principle applies to other challenging situations as well. Parenting, although not as dangerous, requires that same bravery, we have to be brave for our kids, even when we feel immobilized by fear and anxiety, frustration or grief.
The stakes may be different, but the courage required is just as great. We have to get up each day and work for them, we learn to be utterly selfless in order to be there for the ones we love the most. This is especially true for parents of children who are struggling.
If you are a parent of a child who is struggling developmentally, you may be researching what you can do to help them and Get Off Your X. You may be desperate for answers and eager to take action. To do something while you wait for answers, maybe while you wait for a diagnosis. Your child may have received a diagnosis of autism or other learning or developmental disability and you are waiting for therapy or school services. The wait can be agonizing, as every day feels like a precious opportunity lost.
Waiting on these things can take an excruciating amount of time, especially when coupled with your worry. The uncertainty and helplessness can be overwhelming.
Maybe your child is already receiving services and you're unhappy with the training of the professionals or they are not available when you need them. Perhaps the support you're getting is inadequate or doesn't feel right for your child. Maybe their approach just is not right for your child.
You know your child best, and you can tell when something is off. You might have an older child on the autism spectrum and want to proactively work with a younger child that you are watching closely for signs of autism. You're aware of the importance of early intervention and are determined to act sooner this time around. Unfortunately, if you have a child that is not developing as they should, you do not have time to waste. Every moment counts, and you can't afford to wait and see.
There is also the issue of what can you do for yourself, what can you do with the anxiety and grief? Caring for a child with special needs can be emotionally draining. How can you help yourself, what can you do while you wait? It's essential to find ways to cope and heal. How can you Get Off Your X? What steps can you take to move forward, to be the parent your child needs? This is a question of immense importance, one that requires great courage and determination to answer.
There is also the issue of what can you do for yourself, what can you do with the anxiety and grief?
How can you help yourself and your child, what can you do while you wait?
If you have a toddler struggling with development, there are many proactive steps you can take.
First and foremost, engage with your child. Play is the language of toddlers, and it's a powerful tool for connection and learning. Get down on the floor and play with your child. Follow their lead, enter their world. If they're interested in blocks, start building. If they're fixated on playdough, get creative. This simple act of engagement can help strengthen your bond and encourage development.
Look for opportunities to model and encourage communication. If your child is non-verbal, introduce simple signs for things like "milk" and "more." If they're verbal, talk, talk, talk. Describe what you're doing, point out objects and animals, sing songs with lyrics. Every interaction is a chance to foster language skills. Sensory play can be incredibly beneficial for toddlers. Fill a container with rice or beans and hide small toys.
Make a sensory bin with water and soap for a fun and educational water play experience. These activities can help your child process and integrate sensory information. Don't underestimate the power of movement. Get your child outside, let them run and climb and explore. The gross motor skills they develop now will serve them well later.
Look for ways to sneak in learning. Make mealtime educational by cutting food into fun shapes. Sing the ABC song while you drive.
Every moment can be a teaching moment.
And don't forget to take care of yourself. It's hard to pour from an empty cup. Find respite when you can, lean on support systems. Your well-being is crucial to your child's well-being.
Getting Off Your X means taking action, no matter how small it may seem.
It means engaging, teaching, advocating. It means being your child's rock, their guiding light. It won't be easy, and there will be hard days.
But the rewards will be immeasurable.
You have the power to make a difference for your child. So, don't wait. Get Off Your X. Move forward, even if it's just a small step. Your child is counting on you. Start today, and watch your child thrive.
